Tag: Being Sensitive

spirituality

Nasty fairy moment

designingfairy

I’m experiencing a nasty fairy moment. It could be the half a garlic bread I just scarfed down, or that I overslept this morning and had an amazing dream and had to wake up, or maybe just hormones. Nasty fairy moments are when I am not all positive, happy, and spiritual. Sometimes, they can feel good. After all, that is a lot of pressure to always be positive, happy and spiritual, right? Maybe I need nasty fairy moments.

Nasty fairy moments often include nasty feelings like envy, hostility, negativity, and just plain bitchiness. There’s often a high degree of self pity thrown in there. I’ll say things to myself like, “No one cares.” “Why try, it won’t make a difference.” “I’ve failed before.” These even feel prickly and icky.

I hate the thoughts the most and some can be quite cutting ones that surprise me. I would guess that although I’m mostly fairy, I am in a human body. 🙂

Way, way back, I had a design client from hell. No, really. As soon as she approached me, I had a bad feeling. I knew we’d have control battles when we fought over where we should meet. When I visited her home, she was highly specific about how close to the curb I should park. Needless to say, I did NOT follow my inner guidance at the time. In a very nasty confrontation, she told me I was not who I portrayed myself to be. I was a nasty fairy! And that’s when I discovered that part of me.

I look back at this moment, and now I chuckle. I am by far not lighthearted all the time, like you would think fairies would be. I have Scorpio in my Moon, so I am rather serious and intense in my emotions. I live life down into the layers. I have to work at the lighthearted thing. (Ironically, though, it must be in there, because most of my artwork is rather fun and whimsical.). So I always thought it funny that the Fairies had found me. But then, I look at my work with Nature like a little scientist diving in and trying to understand and learn, and mostly, discover. I would imagine, the Fairies aren’t always lighthearted all the time themselves. And I would guess, there are quite a few who are nasty little fairies at times.

(Of note, I was recently told I was the epitomy of joy. Okay, okay, my true soul is probably rather silly and maybe even joyful. I do have to admit.)

Animal Communication · Animals · Intuition · psychic tips · spiritual lessons

Animals mirroring us

designingfairy

Do our animals take on our stuff? Do they mirror us? Or, do they just have similar issues? Or, are they affected by stress, or genetics? We discussed this in the most recent class I taught at Yavapai Community College. My answer is that everything is not cut and dry. All these questions are true. Different times and circumstances we may find different answers.

Recently, in one situation, I found that the answer was that our animals mirror and hold our energies. Sarah, my lovely, older beagle mix, had a bladder infection. This was during a time I was particularly pissed off at the world and everything. I hadn’t even noticed at the time I was instinctually downing glass after glass of cranberry juice. In hindsight, I wish I had given some to Sarah.

We moved to our new place and Sarah’s bladder infection, with my anger, dissipated and began to heal. She was doing great and so was I. But through a series of events, my balance got thrown right off. Sure enough, Sarah had an ear infection that threw her into vertigo! Later we would find at the vet’s office, she had a foxtail deep in her ear that had to be removed. What I heard intuitively was something that was there, and shouldn’t have been, was ready to come out and was dislodged causing problems. Ironically, when the foxtail was discovered, I spent those days emotionally “processing” alot of old stuff that needed to go. 

I finally got it, the lesson, through my loyal, dog friend. I looked at her and said, “Sarah, let’s get our balance back. You don’t need to take this on.”

After lots of talks with my helpers and friends, a ton of writing about whatever spilled out, I felt my balance return and my clarity. Sure enough, Sarah’s visit to the vet revealed a clear and healthy ear. Coincidence? We know better.

Can talking to your animal end the mirroring and carrying? As an over-responsible empath, I can say that it has been a challenge for me to learn that “carrying is not caring.” Perhaps, Sarah is learning the same, and no amount of conversations will simply stop the pattern until she gets it, or perhaps, I get it.

empaths

An Empath Goes To The Movies

designingfairy

Anyone who knows me knows that I love movies. I dig the story. One of my guilty pleasures has been joining Netflix. So, for my new blog feature, I rate the movies for sensitivity level and appeal. Here’s my reviews from a Sensitive’s point of view of the latest movies I watched:

  1. Coco Before Chanel

I didn’t dig this movie. I love clothes and fashion, but this one dragged on and on. And I usually love Audrey Tatou of Amelie fame, but she frowned a great deal and brooded through most of the 2 hours, which contrasted with her Amelie portrait of optimism. When the writers introduce the car, you already know what is coming.

Sensitive rating: 7 for too much emotional angst that an empath may walk away feeling.

2. UP

What a fun and upbeat, feel good movie. For dog lovers, you will love the “talking” dogs. The writers must be dog parents because they “get” their unique point of view. I like the message carried throughout the movie of finding family however it comes and the take on aging with truly living.

Sensitive rating: 2 for a little sadness in the beginning. (The beginning really hit a nerve with me.) Possible animal cruelty but the animals are protected and saved in the long run so safe to watch.

And 3. Big sensitivity warning this week.

Don’t watch A Haunting: the series.

Sensitive rating: 10 I actually had the worst migraine watching this show recently. Like most of us, much of my sensitivity has increased. The slightest  negativity wreaks havoc on my system. Reactments of actual hauntings, much that are negative and highly violent, are the fare for this show. I did not know this going in. When the Warrens come in and proclaim every haunting is a demon, a part of me check outs. Stay away Sensitives.

Until next time…

For help with your sensitivity, see my Psychic tips, or sign up for the Care of the Sensitive class on the Online Classes page. You can also sign up for a reading.  I am also working hard on a new Ebook to help you.

empaths · Intuition · sensitivity

Recognizing Energies

designingfairy4 Comments

I’ve been quite absent from my biz and my blog. As I prepare for a rebirth, there is much to do. I am still contemplating the fate of my website, ronniannhall.com, as my name may even change, and my focus is changing. I am still awaiting guidance.

I’ve been learning so much lately–huge lessons! The energies in the air are pretty wild lately. You almost need one of those pool floaty things to stay above the water. Many souls have been leaving, and many huge shake-ups. Gratefully, I am hearing my guidance louder than ever. I’ve got stalker Guides!

So, let’s talk about energy. It’s the perfect new age woo-woo term that has gone mainstream. I am learning the fine art of recognizing energy. Creepy stalker guy friend who appears to be helpful and nice, but something doesn’t feel right at all? Listen to that feeling. That creepy feeling was an alternative motive. Don’t listen to the words, but notice the feeling.

For many of us, we have shut down our feelers. Strong empaths may have learned this survival technique. But this is our lifeline! Find a safe place to feel and then tune in: creepy feeling, good feeling, sad feeling? And listen to your gut. Everything may LOOK perfect, but does it feel good?

healing · Intuition · new thinking · spiritual lessons

Are you an Emma Lou or a Cranky Patron?

designingfairy4 Comments

Bill and I went to the new library the other day and I am writing this from a cozy seat there now. You should see the new building. It’s a bit out of place in our AZ town–modern architecture, futuristic design, bright orange chairs and state of the art computers. It looks like a spaceship. I keep wondering when we are going to take off.

While hanging out in the non-fiction area, I overhead the beginning of a conversation.  A woman with her daughter was complaining about the new library. It’s too big…she can’t find anything…why didn’t they carry this book or that? The complaints didn’t stop. The vent was blowing on her head (but she refused to move). They only have one vegan cookbook and it’s not even the most up to date.  

I glanced over at Bill who frowned. “Why then, doesn’t she leave?” He whispered to me.

After twenty minutes of this barrage of nasty complaints, I was feeling cranky myself! This woman, I thought, must be absolutely miserable. How can anything good get through that?

Now don’t get me wrong. I’ve had a few bad days where my nasties probably came out like that–in a barrage of criticisms. This was a scary mirror I didn’t want to have.

When we got home, there was Emma Lou Bangles, our 3 year old basset girl. (A mirror I’d like to have.) Emma Lou, on the other hand, is the complete opposite of the cranky library patron. Emma Lou is excited about everything. A leaf? Cool! The sun is out? Yeah! A kiss? Oh good. A moving bug on the carpet? Even better!  She is a high energy, vibrational being made of pure God. All she sees is light.

Perhaps the cranky patron was once like Emma Lou, and somewhere along the way, that light inside of her got horribly blocked. She couldn’t see the leaf, or the sun, or even delight over the crawling bug! They all become nuisances.

So, today, which are you? Don’t become a cranky patron. Hang out with the Emma Lou’s and have them rub off on you.

Hey, is that glitter? Cool….

empaths · pen and ink drawings · Seeing Things · whimsical illustration

Madam Barrakissa says

designingfairy2 Comments

img043Madam Barrakissa says, “Empaths, Just because you can feel it, see it and experience it, does not mean you have to fix it.”

(my little alter ego filled with wisdom, Madam Barrakissa Bamba. The name is taken from a nigerian spam email. Isn’t it fabulous?)

empaths · Seeing Things · sensitivity

Contacts vs. Glasses & the Empath

designingfairy1 Comment

It’s amazing how switching from glasses to contact lenses again has changed my perception in life.

One thing I have noticed is I felt more protected when I had glasses. This seems strange.The glasses created a nice barrier between what I was seeing and the world. Without them, I feel vulnerable and exposed.

Being so empathic, I realize that if indeed, the eyes are a window to the soul, perhaps by seeing eye-to-eye with others I may have the tendency to jump in and read too much of another person. I don’t need to go there! My glasses are usually always dirty in some way so that extra barrier must help also.

I feel more attractive with the contact lenses back in place after the long absence, perhaps after years of brainwashing that girls with glasses don’t get passes? Ha ha. I am not sure. It’s not to the world I want to feel attractive with, but myself. I can see my eyes again and all the emotion behind them.

Seeing clearly has other disadvantages. Did I really want to notice this or that? I already notice too much in my environment. It’s almost another barrier to focusing on myself and my own world–another trap for an empath.

As I write this, my left contact is growing fuzzy. Resistant to the new vision? Do I want to run for the glasses and hide again? Maybe…

manifesting · metaphysical · spiritual lessons

How Not To Manifest-repost

designingfairy

I was going through my blog posts to put together for a writing portfolio, and I came across my favorite post on manifesting. It still works, or, um, doesn’t work today.

  1. Obsess over what you don’t have. This is very important for not manifesting what you want.
  2. Freak out completely over what is missing.
  3. Begin to deteriorate emotionally and question if your Guides give a flying monkey or not if you eat, or have gas money, or what you need. Don’t trust at all. And absolutely, don’t, under any circumstances, remind yourself of times when your Guides and the Universe came through for you. This may be the time they don’t.
  4. Feel resentment because what you need isn’t coming from the sources you think it should. Resent everyone. It’s probably their fault.
  5. Don’t allow yourself to play, relax, or enjoy anything, because after all, you need to only focus on creating what you need. This is the responsible way to do things.
  6. Be extra hard on yourself for not manifesting what you need. Tell yourself you are flawed in some way or that no one cares about you.
  7. Force yourself to do things you hate, or that you should do, to get what you want.
  8. Obsess some more. Obsessing is always a good thing to show the Universe how much you really care.
  9. And finally, and this is very important, take all of this very, very seriously.
psychic tips · spiritual lessons

the white unicorn

designingfairy

Butterflydoctor2

(Butterfly doctor by Ronni a. Hall)

Yesterday, at Adrienne’s Fairy and Angel chat on Ning, we met a unicorn. It was a powerful invocation led by Adrienne which led me face to face with a white horse with horn. The unicorn’s message was that my heart was blocked and that most of my Guides have been working overtime to reopen that space in my chest!

It’s been a very tough summer. Our RAD teen has been at cross-purposes with our goals to be a happy family. She really only wants control, not love, at this time. The mostly sweet little girl is replaced by something foreign and her actions and words have done a number on us.  So, meeting this unicorn with this message seemed timely and true.

This morning I woke from a dream visit with my Mom. She reminded me to take care of my inner child, the one who has been bullied and ignored through most of the summer.

I had a special Mom. She often gave me small presents that my inner child loves, well up until I was older and grown and in my 30s. I tried to parent my daughter the same way giving her gifts and toys for special occasions. With her therapists lately she complains how the bag of clothes I gave her were not good enough and I should know what she likes, or the book I tried to give her (Sark) I thought she’d like, was me forcing her to read something. (RAD teens hate to be nurtured or parented unless they feel in control). What really hurt was when most of her “stuff” I gave her through those years were put into the yard sale we had.

I had to think…was I also rejecting my own inner parenting to myself? Was I telling myself what I was doing wasn’t enough? What I was giving not enough? Was I even spending time with my inner child? Who, unlike my daughter, would actually appreciate and enjoy it?

I think the white unicorn represents our inner child’s power and glory.  When we deny it and act too adult, we lose our power. We lose our special light inside.

Go embrace your inner unicorn! Seek out the fun part of you. The one that loves stickers and tiny toys. It’s the place to start for the wounded heart.

 

healing · Intuition · spiritual lessons

Crazy energy report and slow time of year

designingfairy

Okay, the energies have been wild lately! If you are sensitive, you are feeling it. I’ve had a bug lately and because of the fever, I was so ungrounded and seeing the energies. it was coming off of everything! There’s been lots of spirit contact,  lots of changes, and lots of Guides hanging nearby (opposite of what Emerging Angels has reported). My Guides have been near as well as, many clients’ Guides lending a hand. The energy is building for big changes and new doors opening that are about to happen. It’s been busy! It may be Mercury Retrograde, but it’s also a weird time of year..August/September.

Funny story…one year many moons ago, I saw a career counselor at the college I often take enrichment classes at in desperation and frustration.  We went over my Myers Brigg and decided I was an INFJ. I told her I was so tired of my work at the time and I wanted a change. I mentioned how I wanted to create books and art.

Switch to the next year. I went to same career counselor. Bitched about the same things. She told, “Do you realize you showed up here the exact time of year as last time?” Apparently, the August/September slump time affects me greatly. I worry about paying the basics and if this is what I should be doing…blah blah blah. Come October, things really pick up and I shut up again until January slump.

I tell this to myself after massive marketing and publicity and still just coming out of slow times. Apparently, there is a rhythm to life we can’t avoid. Perhaps each year I am one step more ahead. Or maybe I need to ask for more.