Category: spiritual lessons

spiritual guidance · spiritual lessons · writing

It’s My Birthday What I’ve Learned List

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I’ve always seen birthdays as the beginning of a new year. It’s at that time, we look over our lives and do a sum-up or a “where am I now” assessment. If it’s been a bad year, the birthday can be a little tough to handle. A good year, a breeze. This year, I look back and see a beautiful yet challenging year of real growth. Before I move forward, I’d like to reflect on what I learned. Maybe you can relate to some of these lessons. Drum roll please.

  1. There are many avenues to solve a problem or find answers. There is no ONE WAY. This includes in medicine, religion, and in life.
  2. Love, real love endures, and can’t be destroyed.
  3. Never leave hamburger in your garbage can for too long unless you like lots of crawly bugs. (Maggot Invasion of 2011)
  4. Trust in your guidance, but not blindly. Keep track of what you are receiving and what was a truth for you. We build trust with our spiritual helpers just like in any other relationship. You are creating a solid foundation.
  5. You know what is best for you.
  6. DO NOT leave out sweet potatoes on the counter unless you want them to be stolen. Protect what matters to you.
  7. People will surprise you–in good ways and in bad, but don’t lose hope in people. Encourage the good. It’s their choice from there. And some folks are just so broken they can’t  “act good.”
  8. The greatest joys are in the simple acts of love — being cuddled, a wet nose up against yours, a kind word from a friend, a heart-spoken loving letter.
  9. Sometimes it’s not your battle.
  10. We all just really want to be seen. (Think the movie AVATAR).
  11. I NEED to draw and write. It’s not a fun hobby. It’s my soul’s voice.
  12. True friends will hear you and what really matters to you and how you feel. And will HONOR that. I am grateful for mine.
  13. We sure don’t need to recreate our childhood patterns over and over, and yet we do. The key is to figure it out and get to those core beliefs that aren’t yours and throw them away. Then, with understanding you can have compassion for yourself and others. We are all just learning.
  14. God sent down dogs and cats so we can have just the slightest idea of what loving really is like. We had forgotten.
  15. Don’t eat a whole bag of microwave popcorn in one sitting.
  16. You can survive anything with good, consistent support; most of the time.
  17. Fairy energy is the key to happiness.
  18. We are connected to those we love. No amount of physical separation matters. They are  just a thought or feeling away.
  19. You have needs too and are just as important as everyone else’s.
  20. The key against abuse is to tell your story. Abuse is about powerlessness and stifling your voice. Let your voice be heard. That’s where your real power is.
  21. Critical people are usually just pissed off.
  22. I close with the words from a great movie, The Help. “You is kind. You is smart. You is important.”

Happy Holidays everyone! Fairy blessings,

Ronni

empath · empath mentoring · empaths · healing · sensitivity · spiritual guidance · spiritual lessons

Is empathic residue or triggers? Nasty fairy attacks

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Like most of us that write or teach, I usually am learning what I need to share that week. With all this great lunar energy has come some good lessons and lots of insight. The lessons being learned haven’t been all too comfortable but big.

Yesterday I had a cranky or nasty fairy attack. I don’t have a great deal of patience as it is, but I was feeling super-impatient with others.

I went to Unity church yesterday feeling good and relaxed and found myself halfway through the morning cranky, drained and wanting to sleep. Keep in mind that the room was warm and even the Rev. complained that there were a few who were yawning through his lesson.

I concluded that I was picking up some nasty stuff including the general mood in the room of malaise. I did have a cranky encounter with one friend , who was being super-critical, and another who felt demanding to me because he was miffed I gave him the cold shoulder, so I figured I was picking up their stuff coming at me. That made logical sense and would explain my mood and energy drain.

Being an empath, which I am sure you can relate to, we can often pick up other folks’ stuff unknowingly even if they are thinking about us from far away. Discerning who and what it is you are picking up is crucial detective work. But what if what’s really happening is someone else’s SH*T is triggering your SH*T?

After a good night’s sleep asking for guidance, I realized that is exactly what occurred. Yes, I picked up on the mood of the room, but it was my interactions with my friends’ stuff that got me reeling and upset. ANGER is a great indicator that someone has blasted through your boundaries, which is a little of what had happened. But with new insight I realized that the big issue I had been working on from my past was being mirrored in their behavior towards me. They had just given me little clues.

When I woke up, I made a list of those behaviors that really peeved me and I could see there was a pattern developing. I continually got very upset when someone else demands of me with no regard to my needs, or is controlling and forceful while trampling my boundaries. This pattern was one that I grew up with and I probably wasn’t aware consciously that it upset me so much back then, but it stayed buried inside me until others push those specific buttons.

What I learned from this experience is not only that sometimes it isn’t empathic feeling I am picking up but those trigger buttons, but I also noticed that there isn’t a pat answer or explanation for every experience we have. If I had stopped there, and concluded that I was just sponging off someone’s feelings, or someone was psychic attacking me, or even that “bad spirits” were draining me, or, that I wasn’t “loving enough and they were only mirrors,”  I wouldn’t have gotten to the meat of that particular situation. That is one big thing I have against some new age or spiritual teachings. Every story is different, and that means different answers and different solutions. Blanket answers like “it’s all just fear or love,” may be true at the core, but doesn’t give real world day to day conclusions. Nor is “just love others” when the human relationship is so complex with all our stuff bouncing off each other! And I don’t know about you, but when someone tramples my boundaries or is abusive to me, just throwing love their way when I am supposed to be speaking up for myself and screaming NO! is not my answer.

 

fairies · spiritual lessons

I am grateful for…and fairy philosophy

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Sometimes we start the process of being grateful when we notice what we are not grateful for. It’s spiritual to be cranky. I can lapse into complaints and feel sad for what I don’t have this holiday season. I am missing my loved one, and family and friends who are far away. The problem with forcing yourself to be positive and only think “good thoughts” is you don’t have that moment to be human and FEEL.

Whenever I am feeling sad, it’s best to just feel it so it relieves itself and the feeling is honored.

THEN I can be grateful.

I teach in my classes FAIRY PHILOSOPHY that I have learned. That philosophy is find the joy in the moment to lift your heart by being excited and happy about the little things. I’ve pretty much had this philosophy in my fairy soul since I was very, very little. We used to be able to do this easily as children.

So, although I am sad and grieving, I can be grateful when I look at my life and feel the fur and warmth next to me of my beagle mix, Sarah, who is elderly and still hanging in there at 14 years old! I can giggle at Emma Lou being silly playing with an empty water bottle.

I am well-taken care of in my life and have friends who love me and are always there for me. To be loved is an amazing thing.

I have lots of art supplies. (always a good thing).

I have community locally and on the internet. I have amazing students and clients who are wonderful people and animals.

But more importantly, I have a pumpkin pie in my refrigerator that I will probably eat all week long. And THAT I am truly grateful for.

I am reminded that finding the little things, keeps me in the present. It’s only when I look backwards that I feel old pain. Find the treasure underneath the rocks.

Fairy blessings,

after death communication · Angel Guide communication · Animal Communication · e-learning · empath · empath mentoring · empaths · encouraging creativity · fairies · fairy lessons · Flower essences for sensitive · Guardian Angels · healing · online courses · online fairy class · psychic · psychic intuitive website · sensitivity · spiritual guidance · spiritual lessons · whimsical illustration

Reconnecting to Everyday Joy and Miracles this week

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Back in 2005, I started Fairy Online School. I was burnt out and tired in my intuitive biz from all the sadness I encountered, and I was going through lots of psychic, expansion changes. I needed support for my sensitivity and quite simply, a little joy to raise my spirits back up. In came that delicious fairy energy, and with it, my love for Nature, and the discovery of my first flower essence I created to heal.

What exactly is fairy energy? I believe we all have it deep down inside. It’s that joyful, playful part we had as children. It’s interested in discovery and gets excited over finding an inch worm on a leaf. It’s grounded in Nature and in our environment and our senses. It’s also that little bit of silly that has you laughing at inappropriate times when you need the humor the most.

This time of year, I always think of my mom, who crossed over in 1995, but is still a pretty active, visiting spirit.  When I was growing up, my mom shared with me the little delights in the world–collecting tiny toys for the holidays; having a hidden stash of candy to dip into; noticing the picture in the clouds; following  that cute, little inch worm on the leaf; and enjoying a good story. It’s the little things we can focus on to bring back the joy into our lives to keep us afloat when everything else in our world is crazy, and boy, life sure has been crazy!

I told my good friend the other day, if this is really end times, I want to go out drawing, snuggling my dogs, eating pizza and cupcakes every day! That’s the fairy way.

Fairy Online School is the marriage between that re-connection we have with the spiritual world that is filled with miracles, awe, and support, and the creating and enjoying with fairy energy as we learn!

I invite you to join us with the many from all over the world reconnecting to miracles, to those we think we lost, to new friends of support this Friday when Fairy Online School starts its new session. Develop your natural, intuitive abilities while having fun, and most importantly, reconnect to you! Head on over to this page to reserve your space in the classes of your choice that start Friday. (Go sign up for my newsletter, Fairy Blessings, and you receive a special fairy discount on classes).

Intuition · new thinking · psychic · spiritual guidance · spiritual lessons

If it doesn’t feel right, it isn’t right for you

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I just learned an important lesson. And which is usually the case, I of course need to turn around and share, because that’s what I do.

As a intuitive empath, my psychic sense is rooted in my feelings. When I don’t trust those feelings, I run into trouble. Often, my spidey sense might not make sense at the time, might not even seem logical, but I find out later, those empath hits are spot on.

It was a silly thing really. I was rushing around buying dog food at my nearby feed store. I wanted to buy a small bag of the specialty dog food for Emma Lou I now have her on. The grain-free dog foods have been amazing for both girls’ health and wellness. I was a little miffed when I saw that the space on the shelf for the smaller bags was empty, so I asked the salesman at the counter if they had anymore. He explained I was better off getting the bigger bag financially and a whole bunch of other reasons, and I started the procedure to buy the bigger bag. I could feel my inner nasty fairy in a fit. I wanted the smaller bag. What was in my one bank account was enough, I knew, for the small bag. I had money coming over from my other account in a transfer but I wasn’t sure if it was in there yet. I felt actual resentment I was buying this big bag of dog food against what I wanted to buy.

Long story short, the big bag of dog food caused my overdraft to go into effect because the transfer did not come in time and that $33 bag cost me $68.00. I caught the intuitive feeling as I was walking away and went back to the store and returned the big bag for the little bag and the bank, later on, gratefully, was able to work with me clearing the fees. (this rarely happens with most banks.)

Lesson learned? Definitely a lesson in creating boundaries. I needed not to give in to the salesman and stand my ground. Two, don’t do overdraft protection with your bank cards. You are literally playing beat the clock with a computer who doesn’t care. Thirdly, I felt what wasn’t right for me and I needed to trust that inner intuition, which was basically telling me there would be a problem if I bought the bigger bag. This is good to know when anyone asks me to do anything. Does it feel right to me? Ignore logic or anything else in that moment, if it doesn’t feel right, and worse, you are feeling resentment, it isn’t right for you. No explanations are needed.

healing art · inspirational greeting cards · spiritual lessons

This Week’s Healing Fairy Alphabet Card: Indian Gardens

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I is for Indian Gardens

(The Lesson of Wrong Soil)

When you are planted in wrong soil and you are not thriving, you feel there is something wrong with you, rather than the dirt. This happens when we are in places or situations that are not good matches for us. I love the Indian Gardens message. Indian Gardens is a lovely forest area near Sedona, Arizona, not far from my home. It’s filled with fairy energy and well, I love fairies, being part fairy. The last time I went, the Fairies gave me a message about the right soil.

They said:

“This is a message about honoring yourself. Do not compare yourself to others or feel that there is something wrong with you. There are lots of forests, but this one has it’s own voice. It is special and enough to who it belongs to. When you honor and accept yourself and your uniqueness, the world will reflect that back to you.”

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fairy lessons · spiritual guidance · spiritual lessons

I got thrown so far off, I don’t even know where my horse is

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Bad seeds can be planted.

They are like these nasty, horrible beliefs we pick up along the way or through childhood that really poison our system. Often times, we take them on like hand-me-downs. That’s what happened to me recently when relatives visited.

How do you know you’ve had a bad seed planted? You feel like crap. You feel shame.

I thought I was doing a good job growing my biz. Everything felt good–a ton of accomplishments, great feedback from students and clients. Everyone happy and growing and helped. That’s all good!

But then there’s that weak spot or hole I often talk of that made that seed grown.

If you’re weakened, usually from fatigue or emotional upset, those bad seeds grow and grow like weeds in your psyche. It’s generally composed of old, bad thinking from when you were younger. Do you relate?

My weed looks like this nasty, horrible, thorny thing that tells me this:

You don’t do enough. You always were lazy. You don’t even try….

This weed then gets wrapped around anything good and then even the new growths are screaming for air! Yuck!

Lots of times when you are knee-deep in weeds, then you naturally attract thoughts or experiences that reinforce that belief. I was led to advice from a marketing guru and she focused on the one thing I was lamenting about. She went on and on how she was making only “x” her first year and how bad that was, and coincidently, it was the exact amount I am making! Double shame attack that reinforced the weed telling me I should be doing and making more. She didn’t create that shame, it just mirrored the belief.

I turn to Fairy Philosophy for help. I pull weeds.

I just need to pull some weeds out before they take over my yard. They are just old weeds, after all. That line of thinking doesn’t even notice those sweet little buds that are growing up from the ground that look so promising. It doesn’t see all the new growth that is there. It doesn’t see how beautiful that plant really is from so much care. No, it looks at my life with the wrong lens. Someone else’s lens that fits them, not me.

I need to live my life in a way that matches me, and run my biz in a way that works for me and what works for me, may be very different than an extrovert’s way of marketing or doing. And what works for me, might be a turtle’s pace of the mountain, but I get there.

What’s your experience?


Animal Communication · Animals · empath · empaths · psychic tips · sensitivity · spiritual lessons

The Used Car Salesman Personality

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Yesterday, I received a phonecall at 8 a.m. from a salesman from a web hosting company. He was perky and happy, and I was cranky and still hadn’t had breakfast. Immediately I felt his energy as if I was getting caught up in a strong wave in the ocean–I was deep under, pressured, and overwhelmed. He asked me a great deal of questions so I didn’t have space or time to even squeak in a “not interested.” He must have been looking down at a list of notes when he said, “So, you have just the one website? Fairyonlineschool.com?” I played dumb. I had over 6 months ago dissolved that website and morphed it into this one. “Sure,” I said, but I was deeply irritated. He hadn’t done the least bit of research on my company to see what I needed and what my company was about.

“Wouldn’t you love to have a company go over your site and make sure you have the right key words, etc.?” Now, I hate all that left brain marketing stuff. (Yes, some of it is necessary.) It may work for some companies, but I explained, “I have a very niche business with a specific audience and I seem to be reaching them. I need to do more of what I’ve been doing.”

“Yes, of course…” He went on and on not hearing me.

This pissed me off more. Here I am in a business that specializes in hearing people and even hearing the layers underneath of people, and all I could feel was that used car salesman mentality: he just wanted to make the sale and get the car off the lot. Who cares if a month ahead I’d find that the radiator leaks and the starter sucks and I’m miserable with the car?

I’ve met this personality before outside of business, and I’m sure you have,  and it’s irritating and upsetting. The question that comes to mind is, “where are my needs even in this picture?!” As empaths, we are so used to feeling others’ needs and wanting to help and please, maybe we even forget we have any needs in the first place! The salesman comes along to give you a gentle or not so gentle reminder: Oops, I forgot my needs again! Oh man, again? So focused on others, we get lost in the pleasing tornado. We are supremely juicy to a salesman when we are out of balance. We will buy that lemon car and be resentful and pissy for months, or even years.

We are supremely juicy to a salesman when we are out of balance.

The antidote is to know and state your needs, instead of ignoring them, or do what I do, which is whine and be bitchy when my needs are forgotten along the line. I suggest using what I call the EMMA LOU METHOD. Now there’s the Sedona Method and a bunch of others, but this one really works. When Emma Lou, my basset hound, has a need and wants to get her need met she:

a. puts her head in my hands gently to instigate a petting when she needs it

b. jumps up and sits on my lap when she needs attention

c. is naughty and steals food to get my attention

I don’t recommend the aggressive “c” tactic as it’s almost as bad and aggressive as the used car salesman technique. Tactic “a” is a nice one that simply states I need this and it’s up to you if you can give it to me or not. This is a great way to make your needs known while respecting others’ needs. Most humans can not use tactic “b” as it falls under the category of “awkward.”

Try it out. See how it works for you. I’m sure I will come up with a workshop and a best-selling book on the method, and then I will surely need an aggressive used-car salesman personality to sell it for me. Your phone may be ringing soon.

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To read more posts visit my new website’s Sensitive Artist blog here. and do check out my Help! I’m Sensitive book series there.

fairies · spiritual lessons · women's issues

Getting it right

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The following is from the my new class, Fairy Healing the Feminine, that starts on Friday. Sign-ups still happening so rush on over to reserve your space.


We share as a country, a universal need to “get it right.” We watch television programs, such as American Idol, that judge our performances and lavish praise only after we “get it right,” and it is someone else’s version of right. On the other side of this belief is our desperate need for approval, but when it’s never right we never receive what we need. We are still expecting someone else to deliver it to us. Because at that glorious wished-for moment, when we are told we’ve gotten it just right, our shoulders release, our body sighs, and pride fills our empty container. Without this we are still waiting, always on the Tarmac, never taking flight.

The answer to healing our shared belief is to forego waiting and reward our efforts now. It is the new female energy coming in to finally help us claim our prize. Balancing our need to be, this soft gentle voice tells us we already are. Yes, we may not have dotted all our “I”s, and maybe we’ve made mistakes and might have done things “wrong,” but who cares. We are learning and that’s good, because that’s why we are here, after all. It’s the voice of compassion–new to some of us. The Great Mother, who tells us it will all be all right; we’ve done our best. This voice is more concerned with the journey and how we feel. Just once when I watch American Idol I want to hear the judge say, “Yes you sang badly, but did you have fun?”

Fight this old thoughtform with its worn-out jagged edges. You will never get it right, nor are you supposed to. You are meant to learn and learn you do. And soon you will one day wake up smiling, because rather than focusing on checking off all the rules, you will remember instead to enjoy—really deep down enjoy—the journey, and for that, you will have accomplished something real. You will know what it feels like to have true pride and self-approval.

spiritual guidance · spiritual lessons

We Are Healing Core Stuff: What I am Learning

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What I Am Learning:

What we are all dealing with now, whether some aware or not, is our core beliefs (that old childhood poo) to heal and clear. What that means is we are all going to be pushing each other’s buttons. This can look like:

— Why did you say THAT? You insensitive clod.

— Why do I always have stomach aches, or headaches and colds? Or fill in the blank.

— Why does this pattern always happen to me, and here it is happening again and in a huge way!

The good news is when things are really at the head of clearing and healing, it looks and feels the worse. If you can just ride that rollercoaster one last time, it will heal when those big insights start to spill out to understanding.

I believe strongly that healing is not going around it, avoiding it, or being fake spiritual about it. I have found in my own life, you just can’t rush to compassion and forgiveness. Or healing.  There’s a great deal of anger, hurt, and grief– sometime a lot of ugly– first you need to clear out. Just like in grief, you can’t rush to acceptance and just move on. You need that moment of screaming at God. Real healing comes from understanding and feeling all the feelings, even the scary and ugly ones.

Repression just hurts…usually physically.

We are helping each other now when we push those buttons. Yes, you’re pissed at your friend for saying that one insane comment out of nowhere, but it did bring up a puzzle piece for that core issue to heal. I am not excusing meanness though. Even if you have compassion and understanding for what someone is going through, and they are hurting,  it’s no excuse for them to dump or project their crap on you and be out and out mean. As sensitive people, we often “carry” that stuff, or agree to be the scapegoat. (That was my role in childhood. No more, thank you very much.) That is not helping anyone in anyway to heal anything.

So as you ride this rollercoaster to true, deep healing, how do you survive everyone walking around acting crazy and having their buttons pushed left and right? (I have this funny image in my head from the movie Alfred Hitchcock’s The Birds where the stars are trying to run from one building to another without a ton of birds pecking out their heads.)

I asked for guidance for a tool and got a clear answer. Boundaries. Like, not allowing meanness, or stepping aside when someone is flipping out. Try not to take things personally either. I’m really good at that, like most empaths. Communication is key here.We can say what we want in or out.* We can be very clear if we aren’t comfortable and what we can’t talk about, by saying it in a gentle way. I always think that those who can hear your boundaries right now, are safe and move towards. Those who can’t,  in this moment, are not safe, and you need to move away from, until they are able to hear you, if that is possible.* Being able to be heard is extremely important and many of us had childhoods when that didn’t happen, or worse, when we did say something, we were yelled at or attacked, even shamed for what we said.  That’s why being heard now, as adults,  is very important, indeed.

Cool thing happened to me with validation on this tool. I heard the word “Boundaries” in meditation for a few days. When I woke up to check my mail, I noticed my Illustration Friday’s theme was Boundaries. Each week Illustration Friday has an artistic prompt theme to create by. At that site, you can suggest themes. There is usually a long backlog of having your theme picked. I have tried my hand at suggesting themes a few times. Well, this week’s theme was suggested by….me! There was even a link to my old design blog alongside the new blog, which tells me I suggested that theme a long time ago. Coincidence? We know better.

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*I cover this in my Care of the Sensitive class and my eBook, Help! I’m Sensitive available for purchase here at the site.