Tag: empath sensitive

being sensitive · empath · empaths · spiritual lessons

Being Loyal to Yourself

designingfairy4 Comments


fairywithoutorange (2)Loyal to others vs. Loyal to self

One of the toughest things about being an empath is you go out of your way to not hurt anyone else’s feelings. Maybe it’s a selfish thing; if that person hurts, you feel it. But it’s also from a place of compassion. You understand pain. You would never purposely inflict it. I recently was in an argument. It might very well have been my fault and I over-reacted. I had taken an email forward personally that lamented about the dangers of technology because I am going to school specifically for technology. It was one of those ill-timed emails that just happens. But like most incidents in life, the argument illuminated a bigger issue I needed to look at. During the argument, I was quick to create harmony, please, discount what I was feeling, and apologize first. I often took this role/stance as a sensitive child. Several days later after the argument, I still had a lingering unease I’m dealing with. I created peace but I stifled my voice rather than be abandoned. I didn’t want to be the bad guy or the outcast among the crowd.

This is a big shift I am making here, seeing this. Little kids please themselves so easily. But I think little empaths never had that luxury. We’d always be tuned into what others needed and were feeling. We wanted that harmony around us.

I have a problem with a certain kind of authority. I’ll give in just to please, rather than be “naughty.” I’ve decided to treat my one dog’s chronic problem holistically which has proven the more successful route. We are seeing a holistic veterinarian who hears and respects my intuition. Wow, an amazing concept! Because I haven’t returned to my conventional vet, I feel like that little shamed kid who didn’t do her homework. This pattern has become so ingrained in my emotional landscape.

Throughout my life, other people have had no problem putting themselves first. When my husband didn’t want to go to a party or an event, he’d just say no, dig his heels in and that was it. I admired his resolve that I didn’t have. I had too many “what ifs” in my head of who would be disappointed with me.

And there’s the issue. Growing up, we were never yelled at. We were disciplined with the threat of disappointment, which later felt like rejection. I can still feel that sting whenever I displease authority.

It’s time to rewire my thinking. Does any action I do please and serve me? And that’s the best and highest me. That little girl inside is terrified of being left alone. She’s the one that is scared to have a disagreeing voice. I have this vision of me being left alone in a cave to fend for myself. But in my desire to please everyone else, I’ve managed to abandon me. I’m the one who put me in that cave.

I’m the one  who put me in that cave. 

And that little girl’s perspective that if someone is angry with me they will abandon me? Some will, then that’s not really a relationship of substance or depth, if you aren’t able to communicate feelings with each other. And aren’t those relationships reflecting back the miscommunication I am having with myself?

Hey self! What serves you? What pleases you? What do you need right now? 

—————————————————————————————–

from YOUR TURTLE SHELL (Coming early 2013)

————————————————————————————————————————-

Check out the How to Survive the Holidays eBook under the BOOKS and WHAT’S NEW section

empaths · sensitivity · spiritual lessons

I’m sensitive to stuff

designingfairy

As a sensitive, I am sensitive to many things. It’s not that I’m a little delicate flower who can’t survive in the world, in fact, I’m quite strong. My body is fine-tuned and knows when something toxic shouldn’t be in there. For instance:

  • My body seems to know when added MSG is in my food. My head will hurt, I will feel spacey and a little whoozy. I once had an MSG high for an hour in a chinese restaurant. This is probably a good thing. Why would I want a chemical unknowingly added to my food?
  • Extra perfumes in my makeup or lotions beware! I will rash in protest.
  • Lots of bad stuff in the milk or meat? I’ll be the first to let you know.
  • Someone just clean the store I just walked into with toxic chemicals? On comes the sneezing.

I used to think that there was something wrong with me. But what if there is something wrong with our world? Are we supposed to be all chemically enhanced and just be okay with it? Have we gotten so numb to our environment we don’t even react to what is toxic in it? And this applies to all aspects of our lives.  Becoming more aware and awake is a good thing. Becoming more sensitive, then, is also.

Uncategorized

Does it feel right?

designingfairy6 Comments

I have found with all the advice or guidance I receive, the best source to listen to is my gut. Now, my gut has been out, so that’s not a good thing. I’ve been too upset about Foxy being sick. I’ve had Guide messages, friends helping, dreams, but it’s the old empathic guidance system that works the best. The guidance I need to listen to feels right. When something was off or didn’t ring clear, it felt wrong. I could almost hear the record skip! It’s hard to hear when fear gets in the way, or your worse fears are rearing their heads. It’s funny, as Foxy’s kidneys are flushed out of all toxins, I feel most of my fears and old stuff being flushed to the surface. We are so connected to our animals.

Animal Communication

Back in the swing of things & shells

designingfairy

I am noticing that EVERYONE is dealing with their big patterns and issues right now. It’s a time to finally deal and clear, I suppose! It hasn’t been comfortable and it is easy to get caught up in everyone’s stuff more than usual (as I mentioned before). I am learning the fine art of detachment, which as an empath, is not always easy, but necessary.

Yesterday my smart basset girl, Emma, knocked over the Animal Cards deck and “picked out” Armadillo. Imagine my surprise when I saw that Armadillo was about boundaries. Armadillo, the cards say, teaches of creating a hard outer shell to have what you don’t want to experience bounce right off of you, and the soft inner shell was just for you! We can be open and vulnerable and all those good things yet still have that protection most of us did not have. I think we needed to be born with these outer shells!

On another note, I am enjoying very much getting back into the flow of doing readings. I am finding I am attracting all the sensitives and empaths like myself, even the animals! I just read for a sweet cat that turned out to be very empathic. Like attracts like. What I’ve learned tool-wise to help me, I am better able to turn around and help someone else. I like that.