I am in the process of relocating my Designing Fairy blog to here, and merging the two blogs–my art with my writing. My Designing Fairy site will now be my website for my art and design services.

How that came about is, of course, a funny story. In my life, I am trying to streamline and see where my energy is going out and not coming back. A recurring pattern I am seeing is “giving it all away for free.” I do this often and then find I can’t pay the bills! All that work so others can benefit, but I am not benefiting.  Not the best way to do business.

I had a feeling that with my art blog, which gets much traffic, that perhaps, my art indeed was being used often without a benefit to me. Now this would be just fine if I was independently wealthy and didn’t want the credit. I need to rethink the “healer gives out freely from her heart.” I love creating but it really isn’t a hobby. I went to school for years training.

I did a google search on Designing Fairy and found someone using two of images from my site for free. Great publicity, yes, but a little freaky. They hadn’t asked permission. There was credit to my website and an invite to go to find great design tips (more free stuff). Here’s the link in question. I posted this on Facebook and many opinions were given. (Lots of different perspectives on a controversial topic). The even odder part–the work is a collage made from other artist’s works and was simply an color book assignment I created for students.

I love free publicity. It’s awesome. But the timing was funny. Here I was wondering if I should convert my DF blog into a website with clear intention, and then being led to find a situation I worried about. Message, perhaps?

Needless to say, I am combining my art over here with my writing. For the longest time I separated my more mainstream, designing self from my woo-woo, psychic self. No more. I am both parts. So, here is where you will find both art and the world of intuition. Enjoy.

Have you noticed others acting just a little off kiltered? I’ve noticed relatives flipping out, some clients acting a bit whoozy, and our electronic devices and car konking out. Eclipse-action, perhaps? Maybe so if you are one of the super-sensitives. Our daughter came back from a vacation with relatives with her storytelling habit out of control. I feel like I am living in a world of unreality.

On a funner note, I’ve been given a complete vision of where I want to head my biz and work — combining my art with the intuition–where I was heading all along when I created my illustrated Fairy Online school, which is going strong. I will be combining my art blog with my psychic blog here to be an integrated whole. And my Designing Fairy site will evolve into my creations site. So, enjoy more artwork here, folks, combined with my usual posts on what I’ve learned interacting with the world of the psychic as an empath/sensitive. Woot!

When you find yourself feeling really awful out of the blue, ask yourself, is this mine? Did I take someone else’s stuff on? Did I feel fine moments ago?

Okay, had a recurring dream that I want to take an art class–this time an animation class–and in order to sign up, need to pass along my phone number. I go into my purse and there are so many different business cards with different phone numbers–all old. I can’t find a recent card.

To make things even weirder, Emma Lou (this is in real life, not dream world), has knocked over my pocketbook from the counter several times, throwing the business cards all over the floor. The one day she dragged the one card around on the ground.

I am feeling a restlessness and a desire for other things. It may be my soul wanting to expand, but I have noticed a slow down in flow in many areas. Readings are still happening, and the college classes did not go this time so I am teaching privately and at a rescue group. I love teaching, but I am feeling that soon I will be teaching more things, and my soul needs-wants to create more now for a living.

I’ve been reading a good book called THE INSTRUCTION which helps you find your soul type and missions. I am a CREATOR SPIRITUALIST with CARETAKER tendencies. No wonder I want to take care of all my clients! Perhaps the dream relates to what I’ve read. I need to create foremost to be happy.

So, how does it tie into the business cards dream? Or, Emma Lou’s crytic message?  Hmmmm. What do you think?

Today Please God…

• Help me to not keep going to the empty well to drink. If I am savvy enough to see support is not there, why keep trying?
• Help me be as loving as my dog and to be as cheerful to see a new day.
• Help me to not take business personally.
• Help me focus on what I want, not on what is going wrong and what I don’t want.
• Help me to not try to fix everything in one day.
• Help me from stop saying “can’t” all the time.
• Help me to just let go of what doesn’t work rather than holding on, resentfully.
• And finally, help me to have hope even during the times hope seems out of reach or implausible.

I’ve had the stomach flu all week and have been doing a ton of processing emotionally. Foxy’s spirit has been nearby through most of this. Like when she was in body, I get an ongoing commentary of good advice. My stomach keeps reacting to what doesn’t feel right around me-when someone says something that doesn’t sits right. And, there’s so much going on with our drama queen high-needs daughter who is more comfortable with drama than peace.  My goal has been the peace, so we’ve been at odds in goals. And now, we realize that we will have to move when our lease is up next month.

Losing Foxy’s body has been such a blow to me in so many ways. For one, we were told over and over by Spirit that she’d be here much, much longer, so we were both surprised. I don’t think her body was in on the deal. There was a great deal of false information coming through, that I now realize, was from well-meaning relatives trying to give me some hope that she would be fine. (Not the greatest thing when you can hear spirit easily and don’t always realize it). That was coupled with insistence from Foxy’s strong spirit which felt incorrectly that she was strong enough to overcome anything. One can’t overcome old age. And lastly, of course, my own blocks from hearing, because I simply didn’t want to let go of her either. Even though we know spirit lives on, a part of us likes having the physical here.

So, her loss is helping me look at everything in my life in terms of letting go. What will stay, what will go?

One, I will keep this blog. This is the one place I have felt I could be honest and true with my experiences. I’ve met a ton of wonderful students and friends here and I want to keep that.

I laugh, because many of the other teachers’ blogs I read are “fake positive” half the time, almost pompous in some ways, real “personas”, and I never wanted to be a successful teacher that way. I came in to share my journey to help others in however way it comes. And, that journey may not always look or feel packaged and neat in a bow, and others need to see that too, because their lives are the same.

I am so grateful for so many Fairy School sign-ups lately. I love teaching the on-line school and sharing these lessons. I love writing. I feel honored you are all sharing this journey with me. So, Fairy School is staying.

I will be changing and morphing my art blog. Apparently, I have many that come to see the art, maybe even use the art, but there is no real emotional connection or support there. My art friends have moved over to Facebook where we chat. As a sensitive, I am always looking for that emotional string. I need that emotional connection with the art and design to be happy. So, I need to rethink that.

As for readings, I need a new way to share my knowledge to empower others which doesn’t involve feeling so responsible for others or feel like I am carrying. Many of the successful readers I know are not empaths, so they find the work much easier and less emotionally draining. I prefer teaching.

And, I want a much easier way of life that doesn’t involve constantly striving to be.

There. I was honest with this blog and with myself. So am forced to move forward with this knowledge.

For my friends that read this blog, we have sad news. Our Foxy the wonderdog crossed over yesterday and earned her angel wings back. Thanks for those who did support us in one way or another. Foxy was extremely special to me and I do know her spirit will stay close. There will be some changes in my work. There were many areas where it became all too clear that there was a lack of  support  when we needed it the most, and too much giving out.