Validating Souls

19 Apr


We are vulnerable when we create

When we create anything, whether a piece of writing, a crayoned drawing or succulent dish, we are vulnerable. We reveal a little part of ourselves that was tucked safely away. As we grow stronger, we are able to bring even more and more of our creations into the world. What helps the most is having Validating Souls surrounding us. These folks mirror our worth back to us and support us when we stumble and step into potholes. They remind us who we really are under the costumes of what and who we think we should be.

Those potholes are the opposite of Validating Souls. They come in the form of people. They aren’t bad people by far, just different species then you. It’s like you came from the tribe of Ookie Dookies who all loved music and liked to write and were round and short. Some time long ago you wandered off from the tribe to find berries and got lost. You were found and taken in by the Ipsy Lipsies. They loved and cared for you but still look at you like you are a little strange because you aren’t into science and math and have long arms and legs. This whole other tribe doesn’t even think like you — their vision and perception have a whole other view because they wear very different glasses to see through — big red, solid frames with angular curves.

It’s hard for a sensitive person to not feel rejected when their Ipsy Lipsie tribe comes to visit and looks at you like you have three heads. They just can’t see you, not with those glasses that they wear, and that’s hard not to take it personally when you feel everything so deeply. You just want to feel accepted and that you belong.

The other day I sent out Episode 3 into the world of my web show. Those web shows are a part of me that have long been forgotten and want to be heard. I ran into an old acquaintance the other day. I sent her the link to my show that is on my new video Tumblr blog. On that blog, I share all my video creations, my sketches and my process. So far, I only share other folks’ videos there if I am truly inspired and out of all the blog posts so far, I only shared one. She wrote back thanking me profusely for sharing the link–she loved the video I posted, the video I didn’t create! My stomach fell to the floor. There wasn’t one comment about my work. I was back to being that little girl being raised by Ipsy Lipsies who had blended into the wallpaper and wasn’t seen.

To the rescue, was a few members of my Ookie Dookies. They heard my distress call from far away and came swarming in. “Loved the bird drawings, they are perfect,” my beautiful friends said. “I love your way with story.” They saw what I saw and showered me with shared visions. They speak my language.

I will remember this whenever I step into those potholes and fall deep in for several days. I will call out my distress call for my tribe. And of course, I will keep creating as I continue to grow strong.


I love to share what I’ve learned through story that usually has some whimsical illustrations or two. If you like my writing, consider taking one of my written classes, or buying my books. You can see my story studio here.

9 Responses to “Validating Souls”

  1. David Wagenfeld April 19, 2013 at 6:16 pm #

    BRAVO!!!!! BRAVO!!!! This was just outstanding and stated beautifully.


    • designingfairy April 19, 2013 at 6:18 pm #

      You my friend, are one of the Ookie Dookies. šŸ™‚


  2. elfacinc April 19, 2013 at 9:39 pm #

    Hi Ronni,
    You are doing A BIG SERVICE TO HSP: This is important. And Your Way to do It is Original, Funny and Useful . My Dear Artist. If other tribes don’t understand is their problem……Not ours. We express ourselves and there are always People understand us….If not so, It means We are different. Everybody is different: this is Each Human Creature’s Hallmark that must be respected and developed along life.
    Ciao Big Ronni.


    • ruthelsesser April 21, 2013 at 3:18 am #

      I’m reminded of The Ugly Duckling who turned out to be a swan. Lovely post!


      • designingfairy April 21, 2013 at 1:59 pm #

        love that story, Ruth. My version of it. šŸ™‚


      • ruthelsesser April 21, 2013 at 11:52 pm #

        Yes, your version is wonderful, I agree! šŸ™‚


    • designingfairy May 2, 2013 at 12:11 am #

      love what you wrote, Elena


  3. Jeanine April 23, 2013 at 1:51 am #

    Ronni..for someone who just met you in March…you have changed my life in ways I can’t thank you!! I to being born a sensitive empath always felt one understands me? Now I see this as a positive way to say to myself…ok, so this person doesn’t understand then I will met ones who do or are attracted to my work. A lesson for me is patience which is hard. Know you have made a HUGE difference in lives like mine..and remember to keep shinning your beacon of light so others will find you and will appreciate what your special gifts are…I do!!


    • designingfairy April 23, 2013 at 3:07 pm #

      Jeanine, that’s beautiful. thank you. I needed to hear that this morning and hear that you shifted how you see yourself. Yay!!!!!


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